Y Monday, December 06, 2004
10.15 pm
Monday had always been a very tiring day for me, and it's a brand new week!!! Still a long long way before Friday, Saturday and Sunday!!! I'm really tired as usual with eyes closing.... dozing back to sleep.... No breakfast for me coz it's too rush!!!
Walked to the MRT station, realised a problem, my shoes. It felt like it's going to "break" some how or what... OMG! So scary. How to survive to the end of the day was my thoughts thoughout the whole day. Work isn't too heavy for me to handle, maybe it's really the low season, where everyone who wanted to get their ass out of Singapore had already purchase their tickets long long time ago... and true, it should be done this way. To buy the tickets long long time ago, coz now if u wan to get out of here to go Hong Kong or Bangkok, there are no seats available already, even there is, the fares are much more expensive then usual lor. So what's the point? Lolx!!!
Haiz.. talking about trip, really wanted to get out of Singapore, shoping trip will be great! But not the season now. Coz everywhere is experiencing "winter". Including Singapore. The weather have changed. It had been raining all day and the wind are often sooo cold right? So goin to Bangkok and Hong Kong will mean that buying winter clothes.. But in a hot climate like Singapore, winter clothes are out, only for December period. So... stay in Singapore lor.... unless I realli wanted a "White Christmas". Cool.... Maybe few years later ba. Go with someone whom I really love and someone who really love me and could spend the rest of the lives together. Geez... White Christmas... wait for me.... :)
Tried to end the work on the dot so that I can go home early... yeah! Coz me going to my aunt's house for dinner tonight coz my aunt goin to cook my favourite, "Salted Fish & Chicken". Geez.... obviously got salted fish and chicken la, but also some chinese wine inside. Really nice lor. :) *Taking about it makes me drool!* Took a train to Kovan and change to a bus.Tried to call my darling few times, but never picked up and never msg me.... so sad. Got off the bus and had to walk across the road. It was drizzling and blowing strong wind. Bbbbbrrrrrzzzz.... Really very cold man. Hurried up my footsteps to her house. My family are all waiting for me to eat dinner together. Yeah!
After the dinner, tried to call my darling again... tough luck! Msg him and he replied said he was chatting with Vinn. Ok lor... so me watch tv. My aunts all watch channel 8 leh.... den while they are having dinner, my sister changed to channel U. Hahaaa... "Jie Da Huan Xi". Quite funny lor.... wahhaaa... Felt headache, the head like spinning like dat... sob... watched finished the show den went home le... with Ah Bee following me too....
After the bathe, chatted with my darling, been long time no chat long long with him le. He said after he had spoken with Vinn, he felt better. Should I noe this would work, should had ask Vinn to chat with him in the 1st place. Guess they talk about being filial, changing the bad tempers, treat people around us better, etc. It really makes me feel touched hearing it from his mouth. I'm been told of such things before. Too many for me is sometimes too much coz I have been in a catholic school for 10 years, and it wun be easy to change my thoughts on God. I mean, I believe God exist, and buddhism. It's a way God wants to express to other people, so maybe in china, they know him as the Buddha or wat... it's a different form which God would appear in. I do understand such teachings.. Thou shall not kill, 10 commitments which I believe will be about the same regardless of whether Taoism, Buddhism or wat. It's a way to guide people away from wrong doings... No matter what it is, I'm thankful. At least I noe my darling can be "saved". He still have a chance to change. He had asked me to join him, but I've rejected. I do not know why too. It does not feel too good. I already believe God exist, and I do not want to hear any others. Maybe ask me go with my mum to pray to Buddha, still can. It's all on thoughts, afterall.
But one word from him really touched my heart, the bottom of my heart, it sank softly to the bottom of my heart, making me cried. It's a word "SORRY". Yes, it's a word of "Sorry", simple but yet it brings alot of things. Finally, I felt that I'm worth some "amount" in his heart. It's really different hearing the same word which I had hinted out for him to say while he had said this word to me by himself totally. I felt so worthwhile for all the things I did, all the forgiveness that I've given him, how meaningful things are. Really made me cried, dropping a few tears. Simple word, but powerful meaning.
I'll be waiting for a Brand New You.
Siging off...
d(@-@)b
footprints left @ 10:49 PM
